Tuesday, August 8, 2006

haf been trying to contact him since js now until now. i feel so frustrated wit him. hais-* i wanted to go out wit him todae but cos his frens alrdy asked him first so he went out wit dem. d tone of ur voice wen i asked u to go out wit me u sounded so sad like so reluctant. dats y i let u go. our 2nd mnth anniversary we din even celebrate, i only got to b wit u fer 1 hr 30 mins. dats tooting short. nvm. but u did make me happy ytd. todae u din. u made me feel so sad. dats y d whole afternoon i slept. n i js woke up. i feel so stupid. y do i owaes hafta cry ova u ? .. tmr u can't go out wit me to watch d fireworks. i've been waiting since last yr to watch wit u cos last yr u watched it wit ur frens. dis yr u were supposed to watch wit ur frens which made me really upset . everything u do u ms do it wit ur frens. don u eva think abt me first .

ytd i tot dat maybe we are gonna b okae. bcos u said :" i will chng, i promise. dis tyme i promise u n i mean it." it took me really long to convince myself dat il trust u dis tyme. but u shattered my heart agn. smtymes i wish u had no frens at all . but too bad, im not so heartless. it doesn't matter if u donoe wad i did fer u todae. i js wish dat one dae wen u find out, dat'll b d dae u strt treating me like YOUR GIRLFRIEND. i really donoe why i let myself trust u agn. honetsly, dere were firwrks js now. i felt so demoralised. so sad. cos i've owaes wanted to watch d firwrks wit my boyfren. n js wen i tot i cld, it was being snatched awae frm d palm of my hands. i guess i wun b seeing u or toking to u dat much anymore. u're js too busy . u hurt me so deeply dat d scars u created will owaes remain in my heart. d 2 cuts on my hand, everytyme i luk at it i feel so stupid. i owaes think , y did i cut myself. i feel so dumb. cos d scar will owaes b dere. n last nite smwan toked to me n said smthing to me which smhow i din noe y but it really touched me n woke me up . eyes were watery wen he said dat. he told me y shld not do things to myself like cutting or brusing myself. thanks :))

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