nadine

somehow even though things fall apart, they end up becoming okay. but in my case, that's not how things are. things will be broken FOREVER. i can't change anything even if i wanted to. if that's the way things are gonna be, then fine. but letting go is what i can't do. breaking ups are one of the few hardest things. i just want to be happy. i don't think i will be even if we were seperated. the fact is that he doesn't love me anymore. and all along, I WAS THE FOOL ! how could i not see through his eyes ??! he has been lying to me saying that he loves me. but the fact is that he doesn't. i blame MYSELF for everything that happened. but i made a vow, that i am willing to bear the consequences that is yet to come if i still continue with him. can i let go ? no i can't. people keep hinting to me that he doesn't love me at all.but i lied to myself thinking that he did. all i said to them was ' yes, he said he loves me' i'm the one that loses out. it's like everyone knows that he doesn't love me anymore. why can't i just let go of something that has no future ? i'm suicidle he says. i am suicidle ever sice i was with him. that IS the truth. i never thought that i'd end up like this. what can i do ?.. i don't need any help. i just want to be alone !! away from all the lies. my dreams were just an illusion. :[ cries *